Category Archives: Social Media Bulliying

Perceived Exaltation 

If you frequent social media then you may have seen how some people interact with celebrities. People in the entertainment industry who are famous and popular in the mainstream media. Both male and female celebrities have a wide range of fans: from the causal “Love your work.” types, to the overzealous “Oh my god, you’re my idol!” types. Both can be quite respectable in their interactions and both can make a celebrity’s experience on social media a pleasant and exciting one.

But there is also another spectrum of fandom in society. This one includes fans who’s opinions are more based in their core of heart, be-it admiration or spite. These particular fans, whichever end of the spectrum they’re on, they are either positive or negative purely. From the unconditionally adoring “You’ve inspired me, I’m with you no matter what.” types, to the spitefully aspersing “You suck, and I hope you die.” types.


Both can be quite revealing in their extremes and both can come-off as unexpectedly perturbing, to a degree. But I would say that both are somewhat necessary as the prior example (the adoring type) is the type to stick by you no matter what, and the latter (the disparaging type) keep you cautious and vigilant.

As fans (and admirers) some of us tend to forget that these are still flawed human beings. They have dreams, aspirations, fears, obsessions, habits, beliefs, convictions, phobias (probably not Public Speaking though), and desires. They are educated on somethings, they are uneducated on somethings, they have perspectives and opinions, they make mistakes and sometimes bad choices, they have responsibilities and concerns. They are not perfect (well, one of them is, to me) but their popularity does not make them any-less merited of respect.

Some people get lost in the fantasy of watching this profession, and forget that the individual portraying a character is still a living being and is to be respected as such.

Selective Justice Waning

Phillip Defranco’s Video on the Controversy

Recently there have been some negative comments made towards one of the stars in the new ‘Ghostbusters’ reboot. Ms. Jones has been the victim of racially disparaging remarks on social media, and has garnered an reprehension to a well known columnist who is accused of instructions gating the verbal attacks.

Mr. Yiannopolous has been banned from a popular social media site after having exchanged a brief verbal interaction with Ms. Jones. Mr. Yiannopolous did not use any racially insensitive language, nor did he cast any severe aspersions on Ms. Jones.
His words were a critique of her mild spelling error in a comment where she attempted to asperse him and his profession. Neither threw any major insults toward each other. This is were their interaction ended.

Afterward, multiple individuals made racist and crude comments to Ms. Jones. This prompted her to comment about leaving and also drew the attention of an authority on this particular site. But here’s something illogical about this situation: Mr. Yiannopolous was banned, but the people who actually made the racist disparaging comments are still active.

1. Why didn’t the authoritarians of the site ban the specific individuals who sent the racist comments to Ms. Jones?

2. Why was Mr. Yiannopolous banned when he didn’t actually violate any community guidelines of the site? He had a brief argument with Ms. Jones, but the people who made racist comments actually bullied her with asperses.

3. Why would the site overlook the hundreds of other reports on Death Threats, Indecent Exposure, and Targeted Harassment to other private citizens, but then immediately take action on behalf of a Public Figure?

Ms. Jones is the direct victim here, she was targeted by numerous attackers who spake words that were a clear violation of community guide lines. And it could’ve ended there, but the site decided to choose a “fall guy” who did not have anything to do with the attacks she received.

To Ms. Jones I say this: You and your work are appreciated by many, and although there are mean-spirited disparagers out there you are very much appreciated and beloved. Some people (Male, and Female) are cruel and they feed on torment. I am so sorry that you had to experience this.

Intellectual Appropriation

A Factual Refutation

The term “ghetto” does not connote relation to black people. The term originated in Italy during the seventeenth century, and had nothing to do with skin color.

The term “ghetto” refers to an area segregated and usually impoverished monetarily. So for black people to take offense to the term is almost a way of disparaging oneself.
And braids are not exclusive to blacks.

Nordic men, women, and children have a history of various braids. Also Celtic culture, as well as Greek culture all have a rich history of braiding. This disqualifies it from being logically considered “appropriation”

I’m not sure if it’s self entitlement, arrogance, or just malevolence but people were bullying this woman for wearing braids and I don’t understand what their rationale is. If any at all. For a people that constantly claim to be the strongest spiritually and mentally, they sure do get offended quite easily.

The New Stoner

Please watch this video.
A Popular Disparager

I find this video cynically disrespectful. This guy is up his high horse looking down at something he knows nothing about.

There are people who cover themselves with Tattoos that were seared into their flesh, and piercings that were punctured through their tongues, nipples, clitoris, eyebrows, etc. But they’re just “expressing individuality”

1. The people who claimed they were self-harmers, and say that you inspired them to change is questionable. Either they were lying about being cutters, or they were doing it as a trend.

2. Some people who cut are homeless, some are terminally ill and suffer on a daily basis. You do not know a person’s circumstances, nor do you know their reasons for harming themselves. So for you to sit atop your high horse and pass such presumptuous judgment on people who’s shoes you do not walk in, is preposterous.

3. There are teenagers who harm themselves for frivolous reasons of uncertainty, but there are also people who have more relevant and more humble reasons for what they do. Who are you or any of the cynics commenting w/disparages to cutters, to judge? There are people in this world who do things that are pointless and strange, and with all the different things that people do I can’t say that it’s fair for you to cast aspersions.

4. I am a person who has cut myself and based on your disparaging remarks towards “cutters” I gather that you’re offended by people like me. Please remember that you do not know what a person’s reason are, if you are not living their life. So you needn’t pass judgment on something you’re not experiencing yourself.

5. I know that cynicism and apathy have become the embracement of society these days, but humility has no room for either of the two. There are people who hurt others and don’t have this much aspersion cast upon them. 

6. People tend to criticize and lambast those whom they disagree with, or those who they do not understand. But it’s not necessary. If you disagree with people who cut themselves, and don’t know why they do: just let them be. You’re not holier than they are.a

7. The “Man” in this video was presumptuous, disparaging, arrogant, mean-spirited, insensitive, insinuative, immature, and judgmental. And in his own pompous way he thought he was being helpful or productive.

It was like a “Body Shamer” thinking he was inspiring people to lose weight by offending the into change. The only thing worse than a mean person is someone who feels their malevolence is justifiable. The worst thing about this guy is that he has Millions of viewers and a Blue Check on his social media accounts. Society loves hate and it loves cynacism.

This guy is a truly negative person who makes videos mocking and disparaging people who are different from himself. What disgusts me the most is how popular people like this are. Cynicism and apathy have definitely become the new drug. I call guys like this video host “stoner” because they are casting stones on others in the form of pompous aspersions.

The Fear of Reproval

I remember this.She blew it way out of proportion by using Airtime to address it. The man contacted her privately and addressed her in a respectful manner. Then she took so much offense to it that she labeled him a “bully” and wasted airtime to scrutinize him.

Read the full message that he sent her, he was not abrasive and he was not mocking her. In fact, he was very mature in his verbiage.
Personally I think it was unnecessary for him to say anything to her about her weight, and it was the boldness of it that struck her the hardest.

She is not obligated to provide an example for anyone. And she’s really not that big anyway, certainly not big enough to be at any “health risks”
I agree that he was out of line to try and place any responsibility on her for setting an example for others, but I disagree with her calling him a “bully” when he wasn’t. He did not cast aspersions on her in that message.

For her to compare being overweight to being Black is foolishness. No one is born overweight. You do work to get overweight, overtime. You make poor choices in your diet, and you eat to satisfy a craving, rather than to nourish the body. That’s a fact.

I empathize with her for feeling offended by his words, but they really weren’t offensive to begin with. What she should’ve done is addressed him privately, telling him that she is her own woman, and it is not her responsibility to be a role model for anyone but her own children, and that her weight, is her business.

If you’re smoking, and I say “Smoking corrodes your lungs. And over time it can lead to heart disease. You should really considered quitting.”
Does that sound like I’m putting you down? None of the man’s remarks were disparaging to her, she only perceived them to be offensive.

And despite what we are told, perception is NOT reality. What we think things are has no bearing on how they actually are.
Real bullying is abrupt and malicious. The intentional effort to hurt or humiliate someone.
He did not intend to hurt her, because he did not cast any aspersions. And he did not intend to humiliate her because what he warned her of (obesity) is a legitimate concern, and he approached her discretely.

It was she who decided to respond to him publicly, possibly in an effort to garner support. Are the hurtful, disrespectful, disparaging words that she spake about him count as “negative”? Or does spite make things acceptable?

As a person who was overweight for nearly 3/4 of my life so far, I know that for some people who are fat it’s not a struggle, it’s just lack of discipline.
I knew my choices were poor.

I knew that my portions were too much.

I knew I needed to get up and move around more.

But I didn’t want to, I wanted what I liked and what I had a craving for. I knew my plates were too full, but in my mind I wanted more than an average amount.

I used to say that it was a “struggle” for me, but in my heart I knew it only took action, will for me to get on the path to losing the pounds. So finally, after years of procrastinating, I said “I’m going to do it.” Then I started losing weight.

And then I went right back to eating whatever. So after getting on track, jumping off track, then getting back on track: I finally got on track and stayed on it.
I began portioning my meals

I began drinking more Spring water

I avoided sugars, greasy foods, and starch.

I began walking more and parking further away.
Most of all, I used a form of psychological alchemy, and changed my thought patterns. No longer thinking of what I’d “like” to have, encouraging the temptation.

You know how people say “I only did because someone said that I couldn’t”? Well I used that same mentality, except I was the one who said “I can’t!”

So I had to defy myself.

Inappropriate, that’s the word I was looking for! It was inappropriate for him to tell her that she’s responsible for the influence of little girls (which she is not) and it was equally as inappropriate for her to respond to him publicly on air, no less.

She claimed that his words had no affect on her, but if that were true then she wouldn’t have called them “hurtful” it’s possible that she may be sensitive about her size, which is the opposite of self esteem.

If your okay with being skinny, or okay with being fat, or okay with being chubby, or okay with being fit: then don’t let messages like that offend you. If you’re not okay with whatever you are, then be honest about it. Stop pretending to be confident if you aren’t actually confident.

If she’s living and breathing and is content with her state of health whatever it may be, then she needn’t place any consideration on the words of others. I won’t patronize her as a victim because he did not attack her verbally.

I remember being called names: that is hurtful. Imagine a someone refusing to go out with you because your heavier than they are: that is hurtful. Someone telling me “You’ve got to take care of yourself.” is not hurtful.

And when I was told that, I did take offense to it but now, after maturing and gaining humility: I see that it was immature of me to take offense where there was none given.

I was younger than she is when this happened, and I didn’t have a society of SJWs patronizers blow smoke for me. I had to develop true self confidence in knowing who I was on the inside. My spirit, my compassion, my humility, and my integrity.

The Cry of Stone Casters

I’ve been a on Social Media for a little more than seven years now. And in that time I have encountered the type of behavior that I thought I left behind in Elementary School. People being as brazenly-crass & disrespectful as undisciplined, and unruly children.

Recently I have virtually met some people whom I have developed quite a significant respect-for, and admiration-of. And although these people are considered to be “public figures” a term which people misinterpret often, they are still individuals with rights to respect and privacy.

But unfortunately there are some people in CyberSpace who lack integrity, humility, respect, and validation. These particular people spend their time and efforts sucking the energy out of others, and it is no coincidence that their common targets are always people of exceptional popularity.

These Energy Vampires if you will, are constantly speaking ill of popular people, but all of them are quickly offended when corrected by others.

What does it say about a person who has to constantly cast aspersions on others? What does it say about someone who has to insult others? Is it a feeling of self depreciation? Is it a feeling of uselessness and irrelevance? I’ve noticed that these types are always conceded and very full of haughtiness. Which comes as no surprise, if they would so expressively degrade others who are more acknowledged than they.

These types of people are a hindrance to the Social Evolution of this society, they keep many held back with their selfishness and disrespect. They deceive the current generation by making them think this type of behavior is okay, and simply a “freedom of expression”

These types of people should not be allowed to thrive, they are bullies in the purest sense of the term and must be made to suffer that which they have caused others to. If we are going to progress as an ever technologically-awakening Society, then these bullies have got to be weeded out and disabled.

If you don’t care for someone, theim being a celebrity or popularized does not give you the obligation to insult them. You can dislike someone without publicly disparaging them, and to their employer no less. Meanwhile, hiding behind an Avatar and Screen Name so that your employer, assuming that you do work, isn’t privy to your delinquency.